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Tuesday, June 23, 2009

don ever read this! it's jus wasting ur time.

today damn fuck type! went to sch today, then blah blah blah... seriously don hav e energy and don feel lik saying it. i feel totally frustrated nw!
I HATE UR REJECTION! it jus stops me to communicate wif u! seriouly wat evr u're doin nw is totally not working. since young, i HATE ppl to control me. u shud noe e reason why. majority is cuz of my upbringing by parents. and tt's why when anybody or teachers or friends or parents shout at me, i'll retaliate back and i seriously don not care who e person is.
everyone of you beside me tdy r making me exploding. i'm reaching my top soon. whoevr obstruct me or irritates me, don blame me. it's ur unlucky time n day. and thus, i'm not going for the bloody chalet anymore! whoevr control me will confirm kill our relationship! trust me! whoever is it, i will do e same. i'm bursting soon. i gave in too much ady, i do not noe how to let go. so i'll jus have to cut it, removing the nip of e bud! i'm practically keeping everything to myself. no one is there for me to share my troubles with la! and to those or this person i wanna share my troubles with, u jus irritate me or make me don like u for tt moment. or u cant even talk at nite n seriously don get hurt to those who see it n those reading it, u noe who u are. i'm jus venting my frustration. it's a good way. cuz my way of venting anger, frustration, etc is by using vilence and i noe u don lik it. it's my habit from young till nw, fight from young till nw n it's ady inside of me. i'm trying my best to control myself. stop trying to change me or improve me.i feel humiliated. when i feel tt u're not trying to improve me or control me, i'll ask u for advice n how u feel. i tried sacrificing myself to make up the differences we had, i noe it will not work. but however, i'm willing to giv a shot n try my best, so as long as we can improve our relationship. from nw onwards, i realised tt i'm not supposed to sacrifice myself or make big changes for myself or allow my partner to change me, or giv in too much, but rather to make e very little small changes where i can and not affect myself so tt both of us r happy with it and don expect too much in a relationship cuz i noe i wont receive enough of wat i nd or wat i want. i nd time to change too. don rush plz... if u do really love me, accept wat i hav of me. i'll make the changes, don tell me wat to do. don really lik it n sorry tt i hurt u by my words. at least i'm communicating and sharing my feelings to u, so tt we wont cause much misunderstanding. i'm really sorry... n i'm feeling btr nw. misses n lots of loves...

seriously recommend this book to couples! "MEN ARE FROM MARS, WOMEN ARE FROM VENUS" by JOHN GRAY. although this book may be boring as it may repeat and repeat, but it's effective to solve any problems or misunderstandings between couples. this book is a practical guide for improving communication and getting wat u want in ur relationship. it really works! i'm into it! so to this person, if u really wana noe how i feel, u shud consult tt book before speaking to me.


will this hand be removed from this wall, forever be apart n not mended ever again??

with loves, 12:04 AM




Canon In D - Canon In D

Fur Elise _ Beethoven - Beethoven

Winter Sonata OST